My Dad Is Gone.

[weirdlet]

My dad is gone.  He wasn't feeling well yesterday (in a way that he's survived before), so we cleaned up the place and as he got worse, we called the ambulance.  I stepped away because I couldn't handle it, and Mom gave me the details when I got back in and it turns out he had a heart attack, possibly two, at the behest of his failing kidneys.  He never woke up, never really stabilized, and we realized- he himself was probably gone before the ambulance came.

We let him go, and he passed around 5:30. 

I've been bracing for this for years, but it still- it shouldn't have happened now.  Of course it had the potential to happen, of course I couldn't push him into healthier habits even as I was caring for him, but- it can't happen now.

But it has.

We put on his music, let him off the tube, and I told him that we loved him, to give our love to Becky and to go in peace.

Just- *fuck*.

Comments

[water-soter.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I am so sorry, sweetie. I know how this feels. With my dad, it happened kind of suddenly. Then he was in a coma for about a week then we took him off life support. I don't know if either knowing that it was coming or having it happen so suddenly makes the blow easier to bear. I am just so sorry for your loss. More than I can put in words. If you need anything, feel free to pm me. *hugs*

[attackfish.livejournal.com]

Oh Baby, I'm sorry. My grandfather died last year right after Thanksgiving. Loss like that is always hard, but something about this time of year makes it just a little harder. *hugs* Don't beat yourself up about it.

[floranna.livejournal.com]

*humongous hug*

I am so sorry for you and your family. I am sorry that I have no better words.

[weirdlet.livejournal.com]

Thank you guys very much. I'm just kind of bouncing around this cycle of 'that really just happened' and dealing with things that need doing.

[beboots.livejournal.com]

I'm really sorry to hear about this. I'm sending you positive thoughts right now.

[beckyh2112.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I'm so sorry, darling.

[dark-69-phoenix.livejournal.com]

I've been staring at this post since you posted with no idea what to say.

I mean, I feel like "sorry" wouldn't really cut it and I've been through something like this so I have no way to really relate.

I still don't know what to say to help lessen the pain but, they say laughter is the best medicine and I figure that laughter works especially well against heartache, sorrow and stress so um...

Have some honor jokes at Zuko's expense? I hope they make things even a tiny bit better...less painful.

http://trishna87.deviantart.com/art/Please-Bring-HONORRRR-To-Us-147261753

http://magiceve.deviantart.com/art/Honour-to-us-all-341071983

http://xamadanxiii.deviantart.com/art/My-honor-192444705

http://tinydiaphana.deviantart.com/art/Dishonor-185329918

http://vertegres.deviantart.com/art/no-more-honor-for-you-310633251