Jul. 25th, 2009 02:45 am
weirdlet: (Default)
[personal profile] weirdlet
-arghle- Predator remake.  Predator 3.  Don't know whether to scream in delight or foam in hatred...

just make the avp poison go away, mommy?  Please?

This was my first big obsession when I was thirteen.  It got me into internet, fandom, and ficcage and other such endeavors in general.  I was inclined to accept but not partake of the Alien crossover in my personal canon, and I wasn't alone despite the overwhelming mass of material devoted to AvP rather than a separate baseline universe for each.  Still, we got on, I was happy.  I was less happy when AVP the movie came out and it was all kinds of wrong for my favorite monster, but that could have been mostly personal fanwank.  I admit it, I'm not your average run of Pred fan and it went wrong in an innocent, anyone-can-try-but-not-quite-capture-what-they're-going-for way that left me shrugging through a plotholed popcorn flick.  I got over it.

The second AVP film never happened.  Do you hear me?  There was no such thing.  There never was and there never will be.  And if I ever have the chance, I will have those responsible brought before me and flung to their knees at my feet.  I will find that old riding crop, and I will beat and whip them through the streets until they flee, naked and shamed, into the crowds of fans that they so callously and meanspiritedly insulted, spat on and generally went out of their way to piss all over.  That thing was an affront to the eyes, the material, and the spirit.

I used to love Predator.  I still do.  I just want to be able to enjoy a tense, thrilling chase through some form of jungle or another, in intense temper-pumping heat, with just enough blood and body-count to give credence to the wire-tight suspense and glimpses of my favorite, favorite monster leading up to a glorious reveal of some tantalizing details at the end.  That was the fun part of the Pred in the first two movies- they might have been over-the-top killers, but they had mystery, as well as detail.  There was so clearly a history and a story there that you didn't know, but which you wanted to dig into if the damn thing would let you live long enough.  Er- hypothetically speaking. 

Is that too much to ask?


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